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I'm Struggling to Forgive Her! 481. Sept 14, 2023


KEY SCRIPTURES: Luke 4:18 The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because he hath anointed me to preach the gospel to the poor; he hath sent me to heal the brokenhearted, to preach deliverance to the captives, and recovering of sight to the blind, to set at liberty them that are bruised.


RELEVANCE I spoke to a mixed group in Clayton, Victoria, on Monday night. Thanks to the Lord, my prison time is a powerful testimony to the enormous work of the Holy Spirit in a place where sin usually reigns.


After the talk, we had a lengthy question time about forgiveness and getting through stuff. But the night also enriched me as I heard others in the initial segment before my talk. I could have sat there and listened for hours. So many people were hurting from their mistakes and trying to get through. God is good, and the healing power of His balm makes its way to the core of our pain and soothes.


But one story got to me. After I spoke and was signing books I'd sold, a woman looked at me as she clutched my book and spoke just above a whisper, "I lost my son in a car accident."


When I speak, I am mindful of this very subject of loss. There is always a touch of offender's guilt on my part, as I never know what audience members have gone through.


Unsure of where the conversation would go, I responded, "Was it alcohol related?"


"No. My son was a passenger, like your brother, in a car driven by his friend. I immediately wrote to the driver saying I forgave him. It wasn't his fault, but the loss of his friend nevertheless burdened him, and he couldn't help blaming himself."


"But I'm finding it hard to forgive the other driver."


It turns out that the other car, driven by a young-ish girl, came across into her son's lane and caused a head-on collision. It is the girl who she finds hard to forgive, even now.


Her son was an only child, so the pain is deep, and therefore, the forgiveness has to be the same size to balance out the heartache and immense sense of loss and robbery.


She knows she must forgive but is struggling. What made it worse for her is that the girl driver wrote to her apologising. Through that letter, she found out the girl was also a Christian.


Sometimes our sense of loss is so crippling we need time. Scripture and well-meaning friends are helpful, but I told her that there is a process to forgiveness we must voluntarily enter. The time to heal depends on the person and the gravity of the loss. I mentioned that provided she was on the path, healing would happen with time, and she would come to a place where she could forgive. I have the confidence that she would forgive in time. But what a trial to get through.


PRAYER Dear Lord, please help this poor woman get to the point of complete forgiveness. Like many others, I have had my mountains to climb, and I ask you to lead her to the pinnacle of freedom from anger, bitterness and anything related she will need to wrestle with.

Photo by William Farlow

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